Tuesday, June 5, 2012

No Peeing and Fleeing.....

So.....I went to have a dinner meeting with some friends, at their home.  I am assisting them, in leading our local Cub Scout Pack.  Biker Man stayed home, so he didn't have to sit through hours of talk about projections, planning, and budgets for the upcoming year.  Scout enjoyed playing with their children all evening......we left at 11:00 pm.

When I got in my car, I noticed right away that I only had 9 miles of gas left.....and the "seriously, you are gonna run out of gas, RIGHT NOW!" light was on.  I asked my friend, Den Mama, how far it was into town (which is technically a "village".....it's so tiny).  She told me 5 miles.  Okay.  Relief.  We're good.....I thought.

Sooo.....I am driving down this country road.....and 5 miles turned into 6......then 7......then 8......then 9.....and my gas reader clicked to 0 miles left of gas.......just as I pulled into the gas station.  Whew!!!

But.....the gas station was closed.

I am in my car.....that has no gas......at 11:00 pm......with my baby in the backseat.....at a gas station that is closed......in a tiny village......that is in the middle of, what Mac Daddy calls, "God's Country."  The nearest, "possible" open gas station would be about 20 miles away.  So.....I get out my cell phone and call my knight and shining armor.

It rings.....the voice mail picks up.....I hang up.....and call again.
It rings.....the voice mail picks up.....I hang up.....and call again.

This time I push the buttons a little harder.....praying my cell battery doesn't die.

It rings.....the voice mail picks up.....I hang up.....and call again.
It rings.....the voice mail picks up.....I hang up.....and call again.

This time I push the buttons even harder......and use mental imagery, that Biker Man will wake up, out of his Darth Vader-heavy-breathing-sleep-funk.....and answer the @%&! phone!

Hey!  I am human......and stranded during the Jay Leno hour.....in my car.....with no gas.....with my baby in the backseat.....at a gas station that is CLOSED.....in a village.....that is in the middle of God's Country.

Even the drive-thru at McDonald's across the street was closed.  Lights were off.....no late night Big Mac's.

This would have never happened in the city......or in a TOWN.

Just to clarify.....
A city is considered a population of more than 10,000.
A town is less than that.
A village is considered a population of less than 5,000.

Well......take 5,000 and divide that by 5.....
THAT number is closer to the reality, of the village that I am referring too.

Yep.

So after the tenth attempt or so, to wake up Biker Man, out of his deep sleep.....(I guess Siri won't shout out on his iPhone for me.....maybe that comes in the next model).....I called AAA.

Now.....we have the bells and whistles AAA plan, to cover Biker Man's motorcycle (I just considered shortening Biker Man's name to BM.....but thought that may not be such a good idea.....was afraid it would make you think of something else)......

.....anyway......I was half expecting a Gas Fairy to show up instantly.  There are many service businesses of the sort, that could bring me gas, in these parts.  So I believed that I could get service, fairly quickly.

Of course not.

A dear soul named Dennis.....with Charlie's Towing, took the call, and.....was an hour away.  He got out of his warm bed, which he was probably snuggled in, next to his Tow-Truck Girl.....and was on his way, to help me and my baby, get home.

So the wait began.

Scout fell asleep in the back seat.....thankfully.  At least I didn't have to wait patiently with a thousand questions of when Dennis was going to be there.  He played so hard at Den Mama's house.  He was doing a Little Darth Vader-heavy-breathing thing......the windows were getting fogged up, like the cars you see parked with teenagers in them.....

.....and speaking of needing gas.....Scout didn't need any.  He had plenty.  We had Mexican for dinner......and if I had been more fore-thinking.....he may have been able to get us home.

I hunkered down.....and got cozy for the hour, or more wait.

Couldn't even get a Diet Coke at McDonald's.

As the time ticked away quietly.....all of a sudden, Scout woke up in the back seat.....looked around frantically, and said:
"Guys! Guys!"
"Scout.....it's just Mommy here."
He continued like we had a car load of people....."Guys!  I gotta go pee!!!"

All I can say.....is that I didn't care how many people he thought were in that car.....I had to get him out to go, or he would pee right there.  He has been known to sleep walk and pee......like the night we moved into our new house......he was sleep walking, and tried to pee in my china cabinet.

I got him out quick.....and tried to angle him into some privacy.....to help him go pee.  As he was going.....I looked up, and in the next parking lot......there were two police cars, in perfect view of us..... with officers in them.

"Scout!  Hurry up!  There are two police cars nearby, and it's illegal to pee like this in public."
He woke up, right away.....and looked around.  "Mom!  We have to get in our car and go!"
"We don't have any gas buddy," I responded.

There was no peeing and fleeing on this night.

Dennis finally arrived during the 'Late Night with Jimmy Fallon" hour.  He hopped out of his shiny white rig, all jolly with smiles.....ready to serve......

"Just ain't right, that there McDonald's is closed.....you stranded out here like this.  Can't even gitcha' sumthen to eat!"

For a brief moment in time.....he was my knight and shining armor.....and had arrived on his white horse.....ready to protect and defend.....women and children.

As he filled my tank, we chatted......I told him I was surprised that there was no one closer, to respond.  He told me there were......and that none of them answered their phones, or were willing to come and help me. 

I couldn't even buy the man a cup of coffee.  I had to be content, to give him a simple thank you.

As he finished up.....I told him about Scout having to pee, and me worried that we would get arrested for breaking the Ohio Code 2907.09 for Public Indecency.....he laughed, and laughed.  As he climbed back into his rig.....he looked back and said.....
"Naawww....."  And he drove off.

There are advantages of city life......and disadvantages.  At that moment.....life in a village seemed inconvenient......but it was the first time that I felt that way, after living here for over 3 years.  If I were to get stranded, I couldn't have been in a better, or safer place. 

I wasn't afraid at any point.....and felt the peace, and love of God the whole time.....especially when Dennis came......

Scout and I, took away an adventure, another story to be told.......

This story is true.  Every bit of it.....even Dennis' name is Dennis.....and it's true too, that the next morning.....Scout didn't remember a thing.







2 comments:

  1. Really.......we live at the end of that street and hubby could have helped.......what am I going to do with you!! Lol thru whole story! Love ya!

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  2. What a great story!! I just love the way you are able to tell of your adventures in a way that makes me feel as though I can experience it as well.

    So glad that you finally got home safely. What did Biker Man have to say about all of your "out of gas" story?

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